Kendall Pantano/The Mossy Log
At Lewis & Clark, conversations about student well-being are expanding beyond academics and stress management to include a more difficult, often overlooked topic: grief. Among the staff helping guide students is Hilary Martin Himan, chaplain and director of spiritual life, who works with students around grief support and outreach.
For many students, grief — whether tied to the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship or a loss of stability — can significantly shape their college experience.Support systems at the college aim to make that reality more visible in a culture where it is often hidden — the campus environment emphasizes productivity and resilience, which can leave grieving students feeling out of place among their peers. By creating opportunities for dialogue and reflection, Spiritual Life support professionals for students and staff are working to normalize grief as a shared human experience rather than something to be navigated alone.
“In conversations, I often remind students to reach out to their faculty, coaches and work supervisors to let them know they are experiencing grief around a death, and they may need some adjustments in deadlines or attendance expectations,” Martin Himan said in an interview with The Mossy Log.
This perspective has encouraged more flexibility in how academic challenges associated with grief are understood. Faculty and staff are increasingly aware that the mourning process can affect concentration, attendance and participation in unpredictable ways. Instead of interpreting these shifts as a lack of effort, Martin Himan reframes them as signs that a student may need additional support. While gradual, that change shows LC’s broader commitment to meeting students where they are.
In addition to increased awareness in the classroom, students have access to discussion groups and informal support spaces where they can connect with others experiencing loss. These gatherings are designed not only as therapeutic outlets but also as opportunities to build community. Sharing experiences, whether recent or long past, can help reduce isolation and foster a sense of belonging.
“Often though, I like to remind people that grief and loss are a normal part of loving and living, and we don’t need to pathologize grief,” Martin Himan said.“Sometimes people do need some extra support with a therapist, but often having a conversation,orseriesofconversations with me or others like good friends — can be part of the healing.”
Rather than prescribing a single method, LC offers many resources that encourage students to find what works for them. Some may benefit from structured conversations, while others may turn to writing, art or quiet reflection. The emphasis is on accessibility and choice, ensuring that support feels relevant rather than imposed.
“Grief support can look a lot of different ways because how people grieve is also so very different,” Martin Himan said.
When grief is recognized as a part of student life, it becomes easier to talk about — and easier for peers to offer meaningful support. At the same time, challenges still remain. Not every student is ready to engage with grief resources, and the emotional weight of loss can make outreach difficult. Still, even small gestures, such as a flexible deadline or a supportive conversation, can make a significant difference in whether a student feels seen and understood.
“I can always try to get permission from others if they want to be connected to others who have experienced the death of a loved one. Some want to stay private, but others may want to also connect. Sometimes those connections allow you the space to be real and raw when you feel like most of the day you have to hold it together. Know you are not alone. We’re all humans who experience grief and loss,” Martin Himan said.
As the college continues to expand mental health services, the work happening shows the growing awareness that student well-being includes more than managing stress or achieving balance. Martin Himan urges students to reach out to her at hmhiman@lclark.edu with any questions about where to start. If you are in need of urgent assistance, reach out to the LC Crisis Counseling number at 503-265-7804.
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